no2camalot's blog

It should have bothered me that I was handing over the steering wheel to someone just as bleary-eyed as I was, but since Bo and I stood equal chances of slipping into R.E.M. as we drove, I figured I'd rather be the one already asleep if we plunged off the side of Hwy 120. Besides, he'd slept as I drove the first half, and I wasn't going to be denied my rest before the impending marathon.

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I'm used to being a third wheel, so tagging along with my friends Marshall and Polly to the Valley last weekend didn't seem like such a bad proposition. Usually I have Marshall all to myself on climbing trips, but I guess Polly was getting jealous and decided she needed to chaperone this one. Despite Polly's being thusfar worthless in finding me a girl who's as cool and climbs as hard as she, together with Marshall they're two of my favorite people to hang out and climb with. Marshall's mantra of "dude, just hang" sums up, in the best sense possible, their usual mindset: be safe, climbing is fun. They're the kind of team that doesn't climb by compulsion, and they don't feel the need to squeeze more pitches into a short trip if what they'd really rather do is sit in El Cap meadow. That vibe sometimes makes it easier to climb harder because it dispels anxiety. And any part of Astroman can make one anxious.

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Standing at a Delta self check-in kiosk, skis and luggage in hand for a Christmas vacation with my family, I enter with growing impatience a dozen pieces of information to convince the machine that the person standing in front of it is in fact myself and not intending to bring a nuclear device on the plane. The rigmarole ends not in dispensing a boarding pass, but with a curious message on the screen to see an agent as flight plans have changed. By "changed" I soon come to find out they mean canceled, with no flights out of any Bay area airport to Salt Lake City for the next two days. An hour of standing at the counter resulted in finding a flight out of Ontario, CA - 400 miles away - the next morning.

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I'd have trouble coming up with a climbing trip more antithetical to last week's than the one I took on Sunday. Brilliant sun, holdless runout slabs, and zero crowds in the Valley were replaced with rain, overhanging jug hauls, and a scene and a half of strong dudes and dudettes dogging up their projects at Jailhouse. I don't mean to disparage the latter, because I did have a lot of fun and am sure to return a few times this winter.

The weather dictated the climbing venue more than anything else - Jailhouse is the only place steep enough to climb in the rain! The only wetness you will ever find there is due solely to seepage, as it would take a force 3 hurricane to blow enough rain far enough back into the amphitheatre to soak the holds. There had been enough rainfall in the previous two days to form two waterfalls pouring over the cliff edge, and yet we climbed happily and drily behind them. In fact, the spray from the waterfalls helped dampen the sound of spray of the other variety: beta for every kneebar and handhold coming from the locals who have the routes ruthlessly wired. I appreciated having said beta available when needed, though, because this was my first time at the crag and I had no idea what to do besides pull-down-climb-up. This proved an ineffective strategy, and this trip report will be a shorter one overall because I don't know how to make the details exciting. (" . . .so there I was. I did a couple moves, and then I hung. I did three more moves. And I hung . . .").

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I'm usually eager to write up a trip report after a great weekend, so my recent posting hiatus does sadly mean that I haven't been getting out much in the last few weeks. Fortunately that changed last weekend with the Valley (yes, Virginia, there is climbing in Yosemite in December!). The original intent was to try to free as much as we could of the first ten pitches of the Nose, but the partner situation kept shifting right up till getting on the freeway. The issues currently being discussed in the climbing and relationships thread were a very poignant reality for three of my friends on the eve before departure, and caused two of them to have to bail. The much reduced group ended up being Marshall Burke, Mike Kerzhner, and myself. Since our three-man logistics are as lacking as our cranking skills, we decided to ditch the Nose and crag both days.

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The problem with weather is that it's highly inconsiderate of which days you have off. If the sky picks one day of the week to snow, why should it pick Saturday? Why not Tuesday? It seems I have much more vested interest in Saturday being sunny than it does. With a forecast of 70% chance of snow in Yosemite this weekend, I abandoned my Valley plans and ended up on plastic instead.

Fortunately this turned out to be less sad than it first sounds, as there was a really fun comp going on at the gym. I've never competed in a "real" comp before, and I surprised myself with how excited I got about it. That excitement waned a bit when I saw the hordes of climbers packing the bouldering area till their was barely breathing room, but the event was still a blast. I was disappointed in not sending a couple problems that I felt I should have, but I also got two that I felt pretty proud of myself about. One of those came on my very last attempt of the night, which was a great note to end on. However, if I hadn't been doggedly trying this problem till the last allowable minute, there still would've been hamburger buns left over at the bbq outside. As it was, I just had the patty and cheese, which hit the spot after five hours of ingesting little but chalk dust. Incidentally, a burger patty with cheese and nothing else is called a Flying Dutchman, which you can order from In N Out's not-so-secret menu. If you have never been to an In N Out, I am so very, very sorry.

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Last weekend I had the good fortune of trying two classic lines, Hotline and the Central Pillar of Frenzy, in the Valley. Weather was perfect, crowds were almost nonexistent, and almost as good as those two, I didn't have to drive!

My friend Wyatt had tried Hotline last week and was eager for a second shot, so he took the crux pitch, a pumpy 11d crack to a 12a face traverse. Unfortunately he didn't send it this time either, and I fell while following the traverse, which was a bummer because the resulting pendulum meant I couldn't get back to the starting point for a second try. There's no real way to work the moves, but I'm optimistic and anxious to get back! I would've agreed to get on the route with him anyway, but Wyatt sweetened the deal by promising the lead on pitch 3, a stunning splitter. Clint Cummins, a long time Valley veteran and veritable encyclopedia of Yosemite climbing history, calls it the best 5.10 handcrack in the park. Coming from a man who's climbed probably all of them, that's a hard recommendation to pass up. The picture I've included only does it partial justice. A beautiful splitter shooting straight up, a highway that stretches out of sight. It was every bit as good as advertised, but I think I was slightly more stoked on the long hand crack on Silent Line, due to its ridiculous location.

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In very sad news, legendary climber Todd Skinner died on Leaning Tower in Yosemite just recently. I never got to meet him, but by all accounts he was a very friendly and encouraging man who loved his family and loved the sport. His pushing of free climbing standards, especially in Yosemite, sparked controversy but also inspired. It's hard to fathom that someone so experienced and so at home on Yosemite rock would die like this. Thoughts and prayers to his family and friends for peace and comfort. Be safe, guys.

The only thing worse than spending my weeks in beautiful California indoors (I haven't yet convinced by company that engineering would best be done in a bouldering playground) is also spending my weekends indoors. I had to do this on Saturday, but it was for a good cause. My (now former) housemate Damon got married to a great girl, leaving me with only the two best housemates in the world instead of three (actually we just added two awesome people to replace him, but that's another story). Though we're bummed to be flying in the missing-man formation now, we're very happy for him and his new life. Still, the wedding was at 9:30 - that's AM, not PM - and the day passed without any playtime in the perfect weather.

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I have a hard time convincing people I spend far too little time in the Valley or Tuolumne. When you live within four hours of them, once or at most twice a month for a day or two seems a very poor record. Since the average person goes there once or twice a lifetime, however, I always get questions like "Yosemite? Don't you go there all the time?", to which I want to yell back, "No! I hardly ever get to!" The truth is I'm extremely lucky to get to go there at all, but I think it always seems hopelessly insufficient because a) there's way too much rock to be climbed, and b) I have to relearn how to climb there each time I go. There's a feel for climbing on that granite, and however comfortable you feel on one visit, you're sure to be knocked down a couple notches on your next. That's why I ardently hope that one day I'll get to spend a couple months on end there, hopefully making possible the dream routes that seem so intimidating to the weekend warrior.

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